What would you do with this?

Hello,

I know this place is more about lead guitar, but I’m interested in the bigger picture. I have this demo and there are things I like about it, but I feel like it’s not quite “there” in terms of arrangement. I have some thoughts on what I’d change or rework (mostly in the last minute), but I’m curious as to what your thoughts are. What do you think would make this track better? Add/delete a part? Rework a part? Incorporate one idea into a new one? More solos? I’m guessing the people here are a little bit solo biased and I don’t happen to have much lead guitar in this. Either way, I’m curious to see how other creative people would approach this.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xV8rCYosOlo

Thank you!

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Hi Andrew, let me embed this here so it’s easier to play:

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Another epic one my friend!
My immediate reaction is where are the vocals???
Let me give it a more careful listen especially on the arrangement,

Sounds pretty cool already!
I hear much Devin Townsend in there - especially the “Ki” Album, very good! I love it!

I got some suggestions, but please mind that I think you did some awesome work here!!!
On the other hand I guess a “thumbs up” from everyone is not what you want, so here are some things I (personally !) would work on. Doesn’t mean others would see these things completely different.

The guitars from about 1:30 could be a little more in the foreground, as well as the solo about a minute later. Great sound btw - what do you use?

I’d suggest you create a few hooks - melodies with guitars and with vocals throughout this song - since it is complex you could play with different emotions here - make it a journey, but remember to repeat yourself.

In the part from about 3:15 you could either use high vocals or screaming vocals to serve the tension.

That part could be a bit more accurate rhythmically on the guitars, this would enhance the drive of this part! Especially the riff from 3:30 on.

The lead guitar from 3:45 sounds a bit out of tune. If it’s tuned correctly you might need to check if the rhythm guitar is tuned according to it’s low tuning. Remember to tune like you play. You know what I mean by that?

This piece is on the best way to become really awesome!!! Even without my suggestions of course. Let us know about it’s progress, please!

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Hey, thanks for taking the time to listen!

I used a Kemper Profiler for the guitars. The clean sound is based on a dumble amp with a quad delay (voices in other octaves) with compressors in the input and FX loop sections and a bunch of reverb. That gives it this weird synth sound that I like and is what started the whole idea. The rhythm and lead are both based on a Diezel VH-4. I understand you’d have the lead/melody parts a little more up front and more lead melody in general (like a verse and chorus, but on guitar). I don’t sing, so it has to be that. Guitar or something I fake on keys.

The 3:30 section, I suppose I could play the palm mutes with a little more intention. They sound more like ghost notes, so that could be more precise or integrated with the drums. I think that’s a style choice and could go either way, but I appreciate that attention to detail. I hadn’t thought about it and it could be a little thing that makes it better.

The 3:45 part… I attached a video to show what the layers are doing there. This is it if embedding it doesn’t work:


There is one layer where I’m sweeping through on octave in parts and that will definitely sound out of tune because it is. Other possibilities could be that my intonation needs adjusting or that my strings are about at the end of their life and you’re picking up on that more than I would. I do play heavy-handed on rhythm, but not on open single note parts like this. I don’t think I was hitting it sharp.

This is exactly the type of feedback I was looking for. I find that when I’m putting my own music together without other players, it can be easy to just zone out and hear it so much that I have no idea what sounds good anymore. After too much time, it all starts sounding bad or I don’t hear something in one area because I’m focusing on a different element altogether.

Thank you for taking the time.

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Hi Andrew,

first: Thank you for addressing my reply! :slight_smile:

Furthermore, I think you are absolutely right about that problem I believe every songwriter has: You need external feedback.
Since I produce my own stuff like you do, I learned that it is vital to have two or three people who know you, who know your music or at least who share your taste of music and who you can show your songs to get a good feedback.

They don’t need to be experts in songwriting, but they should love music! Even an “ah, I don’t know - in that part I miss the power” can make the difference in the result between nice to awesome.

You should talk to those guys and make clear what you want from them and that you are searching for options. They shouldn’t get annoyed if you don’t follow their suggestions. And an anwer to “what do you think?” won’t help you in the most cases. Go into detail! “Do you like the sound/melody/dynamic/…?” will give you a feedback you can work with.

This is, what a producer normally does. This and much more. But a producer will in most cases take quiet an influence on your music and of course this can backfire. Especially if he/she is not good in this job or doesn’t understand your music.

Ok, enough said! Again: Those are only my opinions.

I wish you good luck Andrew!!!

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To me, there’s definitely a melodic element missing from 0:49 to 1:31 (not necessarily a guitar solo but somekind of melody). But I guess I AM “solo biased” :sweat_smile:

(Sorry if I’ve said something that’s already been said. I’m replying to this between two activities and haven’t listened to the whole track or read all the comments)

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